In the beginning of High School, I took a “Debate” course which was mandatory for graduation.
The teacher was quite impressed with my debate skills, and left a personal call to my parents commending me, and suggesting that I should sign up for debate or use my skills of writing & speech in some way for debate.
I was great at debate. It was fun, and winning the “debate” was exhilarating.
But now it’s the last thing I want to do.
In fact recently I’ve noticed myself smiling and agreeing to people more often than not.
Is it inauthentic to not speak an inner or outer truth or belief? I strive to live as authentically as possible.
There are many problems in the world which I know that I could solve… It just seems that no one wants to listen.
It seems that most people- and if I’m being honest sometimes myself included- just want to feel heard and feel right more than anything else.
We get attached to petty ideas such as “Capitalism” or “Socialism.” Do we even really know what we’re talking about?
I don’t think so. You can look up any YouTube videos asking people to define what these terms mean by the dictionary definition, and they usually can’t. Can you?
As an American some foreigners like to revert back to the classic “Donald Trump” bullshit.
While I was in Vietnam I met a French guy. Things were going great. We were having fun.
Then the conversation got randomly quite political. He started talking about Donald Trump and other issues in America, such as the lack of free University like they have for example in Germany.
It was a bit difficult to change the conversation topic- but I managed. I did feel a bit energetically weakened, and also disappointed in my new companion.
On the note of Donald Trump alone, please shut the fuck up. I don’t want to talk politics as a young American abroad. If you can the last 5 policies he has implemented, as well as one positive thing he did recently as well as understand his side kindly then I’d listen.
That’s the thing- most people can’t even articulate their opponent’s beliefs.
Everyone hates Donald Trump, yet no one can actually say exactly what he’s done besides a Twitter post or racist comment the media talked about.
Did you know for example he has worked hard recently to make it easier for people to immigrate to the USA?
Okay okay, wait- I am not here to talk politics. I am just using the big hot debate about my nationality’s president as an example.
Most people can’t even articulate their perceived opponent’s argument.
What makes you so fucking sure you’re right if you can’t even articulate what the other side thinks, and why?
Everyone sits up on their high horse acting as if their way of thinking is ideal… Yet they fail to realize so does the “other side.”
It’s made me question whether democracy is even the epitome of humanity. Sure it’s better than a king ruling, but whether you’re “left” or “right” you could agree that the “other side” has some faulty beliefs…
For that very reason, maybe it’s best to leave politics to the experts.
The Doctor doesn’t ask the People what drug to give you- the expert handles the situation, and you follow their advice. Perhaps the same is true for politics/governments?
Follow Your Own Path
These are all random late-night thoughts. I’ve just had too much bullshit recently.
I feel like the world is a river with everything and everyone going its own way, and I’m like a fish just trying to swim along.
A current (or a person) comes to me and suggests that Donald Trump is evil. I smile and agree, and go with the current to my next destination and don’t waste any energy resisting.
Then another current comes by, and suggests that democrats are evil. I smile and agree, and disengage before I start wanting to speak.
Is this right? I feel quite conflicted.
On one hand, there are times when I know that I’m right. More on this later. But I don’t even offer to help people because I’m not going to put in the work to drill the solutions into their mind.
For example someone might have a particular productivity issue, but they just keep talking and lack the ability to listen so I can’t ever give them the solution.
In situations where I’ve tried to force-feed them the solution, they don’t take it- they fucking keep bitching about their problem despite me presenting a perfect solution in front of their face.
In fact they don’t even consider the potential solution! Like a water current they keep going where they were destined to go- the only difference being I lost a little energy.
So is this right? I don’t know. I want to help people sometimes, but I’m not going to force-open someone’s mind.
People Just Talk To Themselves
Sometimes I am “talking” with someone, but then I realize they’re just talking to themselves.
One guy was having a particular problem that I had experienced in exactness before- I knew the exact solution.
The solution wouldn’t be particularly easy, though I knew it existed. I offered to send him the titles of the books.
He went on his own tangents, and bullshit. It was more-so him talking to himself.
He discredited the books before even giving them a chance! His thinking was circular and repetitive.
I was like, “wait are you even asking for advice or do you need emotional support?” I think subconsciously he needed someone to just smile and agree, and nothing else.
This was a guy, mind you, so the stereotype of girls expressing their problems for support and guys for solutions is bullshit. I think it’s actually kind of equal.
Everyone just runs around spewing their own ideas, hardly open to what anyone else has to say. It’s rather hilarious when you detach and observe.
Few People Want Advice
In my experience few people want advice.
People run around talking about their problems yet ignore solutions as they present themselves or are offered by others. Usually it occurs in situations where the solution would improve their life too much for them to handle.
What I mean is that someone may say “hey can you help me with my car,” and they legitimately mean it. It is physical and measurable.
When instead someone says “hey I have a recurring problem in my relationship,” or they have a sudden, complex problem such as trying to become more fit or create more wealth then they are blind.
Or maybe they want to talk about politics, but again- they don’t want to actually consider different points.
It isn’t collaborative at all. People just want to feel right and be heard more than anything else.
When you debate someone, realize that there’s no winning.
First, they don’t want to change their brain. They probably don’t care about what’s truth or not.
And ask yourself- do you even care? Or do you just want to be heard? More on this later, but you must listen first of course.
Second, the energy cost of winning a debate is too great. It’s like, cool, you won the debate, it was exhausting and a waste of time. It hardly has legitimate impact.
Third, the person usually doesn’t legitimately change their mind- they usually get upset and resentful because they were wrong.
Fourth, do you actually achieve anything? Cool you changed “one of the currents in the Ocean,” but the world continues on as normal.
What We Need: Open Minds
What we need is open minds. More on this later in the last section on listening.
You have to be what you preach. Be open. Consider different ideas. If you believe in the left buy books on the right and vice versa.
Actually study and learn shit. Challenge your beliefs. And if you ask for advice LISTEN AND SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!
Sorry for that last sentence, I’m just DONE with people. I’m certain you’ll reach a point like this too, especially if you commit to mastery in a field.
How many people who “pick my brain” do anything legitimate with it? I say, “read these books and you’ll become a digital nomad who has an online business and can travel the world.” One year later everything is the same. Ugh.
In one recent example of someone asking for health advice which I had experienced the exact same problem, all I suggested was to pick up some books. I am not qualified. Read the books because they helped me.
Is it that hard to buy one book? Either stop complaining or buy the book.
In another example where I met with someone to discuss digital marketing, I soon realized that the other person was basically talking about themselves and their ideas.
It wasn’t even the mastermind I hoped it would be- It was just him regurgitating the information.
But… All of this can be used. More on this later.
Just keep your own mind open and let everyone else be. I don’t know if it’s right to let others suffer or if I should try harder to debate their ideas when I know that certain solutions of mine will work, but it’s not my job to help people…
It says in “The Kybalion” (one of my top recommended reads) that “the master will appear when the student is ready.”
I’ve only noticed that in my own life. I have a problem and the solution came only when I was truly ready.
When I resolved to not be so attached to me and my ego but instead let go and listen to what God, the Universe, Friends, Family, or even Acquaintances had to say.
Addicted to Negativity
Now before we get to where I want to go to, I want to add one more point on this subject: so many people are addicted to their emotions.
One acquaintance of mine I made I recently realized goes through the same loops of negativity over and over.
The food is never good enough. Everything is always too expensive. She drinks a ton, and then is happy. But then she has something else to complain about, maybe it’s political or maybe it’s about some there person.
But she always has something to complain about.
It’s funny- you think that what you’re upset about legitimately matters now, but when you put in transformation work to change your relation to the world you realize just how much you are in control of your perception & reaction to this world.
For example, planes flying overhead and occasional loud motorbikes in Thailand used to frighten & annoy me.
Now when I hear a motorbike in my apartment in relaxes me. Planes over the Nimman area which used to bother me are now a conscious reminder I’ve instilled in myself to focus on my breath.
A lot of people comment on my high energy- I think it’s because I’ve consciously “re-routed” things which used to drain me into things which uplift me. I realized it’s all a choice.
Whenever I hear the sound of a loud motorcycle or loud plane it is a reminder to focus on my breath and be present.
One way you can learn this is by reading “Reality Transurfing Steps I-V.”
For example, one day when annoyed by motorbikes I visualized that they were actually floating cows with humans riding them given that the “RUUMMM” of a motorbike could be slightly similar to the “MOOO” of an angry cow.
Suddenly I was laughing at this absurd visualization. I also visualized the frustration felt when I struggled to sleep going away.
Now I sleep perfectly, and “am one” with motorcycle sounds at night. They don’t bother me.
I also had cleaning ladies which would sometimes vacuum outside my apartment early in the morning. When I left, they sometimes didn’t smile at me and appeared upset.
Instead of seeing angry people (which would affect my vibe typically) I visualized angry people now as an angry ape or angry pigeon, which is now hilarious. I let the energy go and it doesn’t bother me anymore.
Anyways, I’ve noticed that most people are addicted to their energy.
Should I suggest these tricks and try help them? I’ve had these thoughts, but so few people actually take action on it.
I have massive respect for those that do. For example one of my best friends in Phoenix is actively applying some course-work I sent over to him because he told me he wanted to be location independent also.
So few people actually take action. They’re addicted to negativity. It becomes a habit in and of itself to keep things as they are. Isn’t that funny?
The Beauty of Listening
All this being said, it isn’t all bad. I’ve really enjoyed listening recently.
When you shut up and listen, all kinds of epic things come out of people’s mouths. I think it’s called a “Freudian slip” or something like that, where the subconscious speaks and they don’t even realize it!!
And people have all kinds of fascinating body language, and vocal tonalities, and eye movements, and gestures and all this.
By using the visualization strategies described above I’ve been able to prevent energy vampires from getting to me… I’ve also been able to avoid getting sucked into ridiculous debates or trying to help people that won’t even listen or take action.
Most people want to barf out all they know. And I think it’s made me quite a bit wiser by listening.
Sometimes people say absurd, offensive things. One girl recently, who rode a motorbike behind me (she had to follow me to a destination), complained I would “break too fast.”
I know I don’t- she was just an absurd driver riding too close and following directly behind (a big no-no for motorcycles). She was addicted to complaining and I realized by attacking me she was trying to “feel right” and steal energy in some way.
I have a motorcycle license & proper training whereas she doesn’t. She wanted to feel better than me. She wanted energy. She hadn’t been able to complain in a while because things were great so she decided to criticize my riding despite me being on par.
Rather than fighting or giving in, I switched things up completely. Her energy went down as she was clawing for mine, but mine remained the same. I think focused on my own “energy” and “breath” and consciously forgave her for her absurd notions.
Honestly listening & agreeing has done me a whole deal of good- it’s keeping me focused on my own path because I don’t get bothered by others’ potentially conflicting beliefs.
In fact I get to learn something and deepen myself.
People tell you all kinds of fascinating things you can transmute into whatever you like.
I consciously choose to make everything inspiring somehow, so that my energy goes up- if they are accepting of it their own energy will go up as well as we share inspiration & joy.
However if they aren’t that’s okay. Their energy will plummet while mine remains stable & grounded.
When they try to debate me or complain about something I visualize a shield around myself and I don’t get emotionally affected by them.
I detach from my own beliefs & attachments and the world opens up a fascinating new layer.
On a really deep note, I’ve observed that we really are just evolved apes. We are quite stupid creatures, all running around like we’re smart.
In the grand scheme of Universal intelligence we are maybe on step 2 out of 100, with apes being on step 1.
We are tribal, ridiculous, apes that are so full of themselves we don’t even realize just how emotional we really are. We mask our emotional and egoic nature by calling it “logic” and “debates.”
Less Writing, More Listening
Recently I’ve been writing less and less. That’s because I’ve observed how in many ways this blog was nothing but me wanting to be heard, or at least write something for future me.
In listening to others, I’ve realized how wrong I am about everything. My own intelligence is humbled as those wiser than me pump me with wisdom.
I’m working more on legitimate business growth rather than vaguely talking about business & sales and how I want to be richer- I’m actively participating in my own success.
I feel like a mysterious shadow in a ways, with all kinds of knowledge navigating this world and applying it where I can.
Yet at the same time I know that I know nothing. That there’s so much more to learn and that in the grand scheme of things, many lifetimes from now if reincarnation exists, I would like back at being human as inferior and a waste, much like how we humans look at ants.
In my life I’m just living, taking action, and listening. I’m letting others do the talking and it’s opening up some epic opportunities for me.
The more I learn, the more I can give, yet the less I want to write because the more I am humbled and the more egoic this all feels.
I also realized, contrary to a previous post of mine about how we can all change the world minute by minute, how meaningless this is.
In the end you only have yourself. As long as you’re ethical and not harming others, you should go about your life in such a way that benefits yourself while also benefiting others.
For me that’s been working on new products & services I can offer people rather than writing on this blog. It’s profitable to me most importantly, but also helps people (and that’s actually the focus).
This writing on the other end isn’t profitable. I don’t “get” anything. It’s just me saying my ideas, and 80%+ of people won’t even change a bit from it.
I guess it’s a bit of a paradox: on one hand I know that if I change one life from this article that it could change the world (see my previous post about how we change the world minute by minute).
On the other hand I realize there are others things I could be doing that have a potentially greater impact. At the very least I can listen, reflect, and grow in my own life.
The Effects of Listening
One day a friend of mine recommended the book “Reality Transurfing Steps I-V” to me. He told me it was what transformed him.
He was previously more shy, and after a year abroad he had truly grown a ton.
I immediately purchased the book and read it. He was impressed. He respected me quite a bit for it.
The book, as suggested, was incredible and here I am continuously recommending it now. I am excited to re-read it and occasionally watch YouTube videos covering parts of it.
This book really helped me improve a lot in my life. It also made that friend respect me because I actually took advice. I’m sure he has a lot of people ask him for advice that don’t do anything.
Now being in a position where people want to “pick my brain” and “ask for advice,” I know exactly what that’s like.
It’s just annoying, and only now do I understand why so many of the “rich people” are “closed off” or in their own little groups. They genuinely want to help people, but no one listens.
It also explains why rich friends of mine “took me under their wing.” I was not special. They just said “do this” and then I did it. So they respected me and realized I was a do-er. I listened.
So I guess what I’m trying to say is recently I’m a bit tired of talking. This blog has gone on for some time, and I won’t stop, just my frequency is going down massively as I focus on my own life and what’s really important to me.
I’ve also gone through a week of meeting, by chance, all kinds of people who had debates, needed advice, etc. and it was rather frustrating because I knew many solutions to their problems and would refer books but no one would take action.
It’s made me question whether this is even worth it- will anyone purchase Reality Transurfing after reading this?
I think that this blog does help people because I get responses. Which I’m so grateful for.
Just wanted to let everyone know in the end here why my frequency of writing is going down and probably will continue to.
In short, I’m just listening to the world- God, Universe, friends, everyone and everything. As soon as you shut up and start listening, it’s as if every single second has a lesson to teach you and it’s so humbling and beautiful.
In this listening, I feel more like a fish in a super large ocean. Everyone has their ideas, which is like small currents, and rather than resisting I am smiling and agreeing- going with the flow, but then more importantly moving on.
The distinction here is that I don’t get trapped in an ideology. I’m focused on what’s relevant to me and moving forward properly.
Are there any “currents in the Ocean” that keep sucking you in? Realize that maybe they’re giving you nothing, and you’re wasting energy fighting them.
And When It Counts…
All this being said, I would debate if it really mattered. If I were on a spaceship and my idea would save the crew I would scream and shout to get my point across.
The point here is to avoid pointless debates… Though it’s incredibly difficult to tell which are meaningful and pointless. In my opinion, 99%+ are.
This also includes people “asking for advice” yet not even listening (they just keep talking about their problem or going on tangents). Or people addicted to complaining- don’t try help them, let them complain.
I also like to visualize complainers as penguins making funny noises. It helps a lot so that you don’t get sucked into complaining too.
Though as mentioned above, there are some moments where it counts. Like if a family member wanted to try heroin, I’d put up a fight before letting them do it.
The ultimate point here is to grow & hold onto your own energy- don’t give it away via pointless debates. Save it for when it counts.
Very rarely does it actually count. So save that energy to be productive, read a book, meditate, workout, whatever. Or save it for when you need to fight.
Most times it doesn’t matter. Don’t waste energy fighting the current. Smile, agree, move on.