You ever feel dull sometimes? Bored, not exactly happy, but not unhappy either?
Yeah, I know this feeling. It’s shitty.
Unfortunately our societies are designed to be this way, all around the world.
Many people walk aimlessly, with no direction or purpose.
It’s okay to not have a purpose, but I refuse to let life be dull. Here’s what I’ve discovered about boredom, fulfillment, and life experiences.
Boredom Is The Enemy
One of my most favorite quotes comes from Tim Ferriss: “Boredom is the enemy.”
It’s okay to be unhappy, cry, angry, or anything else. Boredom is unacceptable.
Now that I’ve had some experience living in different countries, meeting people, and pursuing my passions, I can attest to this completely.
Crying is so much more fulfilling than being bored. Even getting scammed by taxi drivers is more enjoyable than boredom!
If you’re bored, then you’re not living. If you’re not living, then you’re dying.
Working your butt off pursuing your passion is even more enjoyable than boredom. And if you’re going to be bored, spend it making some $$$.
Experiences & Possessions
One-time experiences & possessions don’t seem to bring any lasting fulfillment. Things are cool at first, and then they fade.
Every moment is fleeting. Time is flying by so fast.
Remember one year ago? It’s gone. Remember 2 years ago? It’s gone. One year from now you’ll look back on today and go, “oh shit that went by fast.”
As much as we’d like to think we have a sense of time, we don’t. We are all falling forward through time, getting older, and approaching the portal known as “death.”
You can’t take anything with you, but you can make the best of everything you have now.
One-time experiences & possessions have not brought me lasting fulfillment, but they’ve brought me farther away from boredom. If in doubt, at least chase these things.
Movement & Flow
Here’s a bit of a nuanced paradox for you: experiences will fulfill you. Notice the bold “s” at the end of “experience.”
I wrote very carefully in the previous section to make it clear that one-time experiences do not bring fulfillment, but it is experiences which do.
Many people, myself included, have waited for that “one magical moment” to be happy. It comes, you’re happy for an hour, day, week, maybe even a month. Then you hit baseline.
Maybe you’ve been chasing a degree. Or an online business. Or one single travel around the world. These thing do not keep you fulfilled!
Experiences on the other hand keep you moving forward. “Flow” is the secret to life.
Flow is the movement of life. The ability to move from experience to experience is what makes life not boring.
It is not my one travel around the world that helped me be happier, it is the continuous experience of adventure & exploration that bring me fulfillment.
If you were to force me into one city for the rest of my life, I would still retain my adventurous self.
I would find ways to adventure, explore, and fulfill this thing often. It is through the flow & expression of myself that I’d stay fulfilled, not through any one fleeting act.
It’s a way of living, not the moment itself which makes you fulfilled!
Identifying Motives Behind Desire
Do you want something? Do you know why?
As a kid, I always thought it would be awesome to visit the moon, or even be the first man on Mars!
I’ve obviously not pursued that, despite opportunity being presented for an expedition to Mars during sometime in my life.
I don’t need to pursue it. If given the opportunity, I’d take a vacation to the moon, but I don’t need to.
My inner child’s motive for that trip to mars was adventure, uncertainty, and excitement.
These things keep me glowing & alive. It is like food for the soul!
Speaking of food… if you’re hungry, you don’t have to eat one type of food, right? You might love Asian food now, but if you eat it once or everyday it won’t make you happy.
Eat it once and you’ll forget the taste. Eat it at every meal and it’ll get dull. Understand?
Living as Expression, NOT Experience-Chasing
Once you’ve identified your motives behind your most innocent desires, you should live in a way that allows the maximum expression of your truest self.
The adventure, uncertainty, and excitement of visiting a new country feeds my soul.
I do not trick myself into thinking a one-time trip around the world will fulfill me. I need constant stimulation.
This is why I’m in Cyprus right now, having just lived in Bulgaria, and having taken a vacation to Greece recently. This is incredibly stimulating to my soul.
Find out your truest inner expression, and find a way to express it as often as possible.
Happiness is like food & hunger– it must continuously be attended to.
Don’t Know Your Truest Expression?
Then get life experience. Travel. Cook. Meet someone. Run, live, dream, scream, cry.
Don’t make life choices to please others, don’t expect one-time accomplishments to fulfill you, and don’t quit searching for your truest expression!
I will admit I’m kind of lost in life, but I have felt quite a bit of satisfaction in the past few months.
I’m chasing experiences, knowing that each individual experience won’t fulfill me, but enjoying the process of having experience after experience.
I have no idea where the hell I’ll be in 5 years, nonetheless 10 or 25. These questions are fucking ridiculous and just plain annoying.
Now look I’m not saying to live life as if there’s no future. Obviously create a savings account, and don’t wreck your health. Just stay open to experience.
Say “yes” to life. Play that game. Meet that person. Travel to that country.
Most “yes” decisions you make in your life are completely reversible. Knowing what you don’t want is equally important to knowing what you do want.
Get out there, make some experiences, figure out what fulfills you, then live in a way that keeps you fulfilled.
One Little Secret…
I also don’t think anyone is ever continuously fulfilled. You can only do your best, and accept you’ll be lost & desire things.
Right now I’ve developed a lot of positive habits, I’m working hard, etc. but I don’t have my girlfriend with me (temporary long-distance).
This is absolutely not fulfilling, but it must be accepted. When we are reunited, I’ll probably lack some other thing.
Accepting you’re lost is part of the fun. It’s like a game.
For an epic book on this, check out “Who Moved My Cheese?” It’s epic.
Enjoy the journey. 🙂