Right now, 99% of your dreams and goals are impossible- and that’s a good thing.
Now I know this sounds a bit strange from the person creating videos like “dreams do come true,” but hear me out here.
This is going to be a very nuanced post, so do read it carefully.
I believe anything is possible with time, but that 99% of dreams in the now are impossible to achieve.
Plants Don’t Grow Instantly
Anything is possible if you give it effort and time. The key word here is time- plants do not grow overnight, and the sun sets only second by second.
Every successful entrepreneur or athlete has had to work towards their goals over a period of time to make it a reality.
Even “overnight successes” had a lot of initial work requirements which gave them the capability to actually be successful later.
Needing To Succeed Now
When I would set new goals, I often needed to succeed them as soon as possible- or else I felt like I wasn’t actually achieving everything.
I recall once trying to produce some electronic dance music. For a beginner my songs were good, but compared to top hits my songs were nothing.
I compared myself to the top dance songs (how ridiculous), and got frustrated that mine didn’t sound as perfect even when I copied things exactly as I heard it.
The same was true albeit not so much when I got started in digital marketing.
Running failing advertisements were enraging, but in hindsight it was silly of me to think I could create a perfect advertising strategy on my first few goes.
This is something which I observe plagues many that are trying to make their dreams of reality.
The need to achieve a goal now is paradoxically often a killer of dreams because the more you focus on your lack of having the goal the less likely you are to actually achieve the goal.
Now I’m not saying to waste time, not work hard, etc. By ALL MEANS achieve your goal as quickly as possible, just don’t be mentally attached to the progress of the goal.
Take Care of Yourself
I once saw a horrifying post on Reddit that went something like this:
“You should give up on your dreams. I gave up on my dream of being a superstar musician because it was eating away at me 24/7, and I was obsessing over it day and night. Now that I’ve given up and accepted the college then 9-5 path, I feel so much more relaxed.”
How ridiculous! This individual does not see that it’s not the dream that’s the problem but the how they’re going about it which is the problem.
Burnout IS a Thing…
The person posting this on Reddit is not taking care of himself. When you start going insane about achieving something now you are almost certain to burnout.
Burnout fucking sucks. It’s a state of complete depression, exhaustion, etc.
You get so stressed you strangely don’t feel stressed- it’s more like a heavy exhaustion. Your life force feels depleted and you have no energy to do anything; even having fun seems hard.
Be Like a “Farmer”
The farmer does not punch an apple tree demanding apples now. The farmer does not slaughter his chickens hoping to get the egg now.
The farmer feeds the animals and takes care of the land. He does the work he must do with no worry of whether the crops will grow and the animals will mate.
When the work is done he goes up, sleeps with his wife, watches TV, drinks a beer, plays with his kids, and gets a good nights rest.
He does not stress whether his actions will yield results- he relaxes in certainty that it will.
How absurd it would be to imagine a farmer punching a tree or murdering chickens in hopes of apples and eggs! Yet, we push ourselves beyond our limits and work harder than we must to achieve our goals- paradoxically pushing it farther away and draining your life force!
Be like a farmer and relax. Even if you’re just studying, you need “relaxation” time in order to process what you have learned.
When you expend energy, you must recover it. This is the law of life. Use too much energy and you burnout.
Live is Living, Not a Destination
I remember once in 4th grade, I looked out down the street & thought, “next year will be better.”
Then I stopped- I was shocked! I had this exact same thought last year. Is it true that perhaps life is life, and that next year won’t be better just like I had always thought the next year would be better?
Well let me introduce a little paradox for you: although there is only the present moment through which life can be lived, it can undoubtedly be agreed upon that there are “better times” and “worse times.”
Discerning which from which is rather difficult though- the mind is absolutely fantastic at creating illusions.
I’ve observed the “the future will be better” mentality in several of my friends and it becomes quite comical if you pay attention to it long enough.
First they will say “when my XYZ heals I’ll be happy.” A few months later this turns into “once my business does ABC I’ll be happy.” I can only guess what’s next: “once I meet the one for me I’ll be happy.”
Even if we can say with certainty that there are objectively “good” and “bad” times in life, we must not get hung up on looking into the future or back in the past.
The past is even more absurd than the future, for we can never go back in time.
My point earlier about “the farmer & his farm” is that life is something you live, not a destination.
If it is food & water you lack, then I can almost certainly assure you that the future will be better when you have it.
However if you have your basics covered, then I can almost certainly assure you that the future will only “be better” if you detach from a particular event but instead focus on the “flow” of life.
To not have a goal would be to not be human- it is in our nature to set goals and create a brighter future. That being said, you should not sacrifice the now for the future because you are doing no good.
Work towards your goal, certainly do that! Just make sure to take care of yourself, and have fun in other ways in life too.
Enjoy sex, food, water, good hygiene, great sleep, and laughs with friends on the road to your destination, and I promise the destination will only then make you truly happy.
If you can find a way to enjoy your life on the way to the goal, then your goal will certainly make you happier.
Relax & Believe In Yourself
Going for a goal should be no different than picking up groceries. I write this article to expand my blog, but it’s not a huge big moment.
This doesn’t mean that it won’t make you happy or you don’t enjoy the process of it- instead it means that you don’t hype your goal up to be some epic magical event.
Even if it is that type of event (for example I must admit world travel is epic) then still you must go about it relaxed and at peace.
Rushing to achieve a goal signals that you think you won’t actually get it. For example people go crazy on “black Friday” because discounted deals are only available for so long.
Law of Attraction, Practically Explained
Your actions & beliefs create your reality. We can delve into mystical “law of attraction” teachings but I can also provide practical examples of this:
Again back to the farmer. Attacking the tree for apples faster will at best only drain his energy and at worst ruin the tree from ever producing apples again.
The farmer’s scarcity mentality of “oh my God what if this tree doesn’t give me apples” leads to scarcity actions (demanding apples now) which leads to scarcity results (never getting apples, or being absolutely exhausted when finally receiving apples).
If the farmer approaches his task with abundance, he will simply let the goal handle itself. That’s not to say that he doesn’t have to work- he still must milk the cows, feed the chickens, and take care of the land, but he does no more than what he must.
Real World Manifestation Examples
While this trend isn’t easily noticeable in other goals (ie. making money online or being a musical superstar) the pattern continues.
If you obsess about being a musical superstar you are certain to either not achieve it, or achieve it but be completely exhausted from years of unnecessary strain & hard work.
This example is a bit more complex to break down in practical terms, but one way the principle applies is in trying to get record deals- if the ambitious individual is relaxed and content with his imperfect work, he will be more charismatic and more likely to sign music deals. On the other hand if he’s stressed & sensitive to criticism, he may scare off the record label!
Here is a work/study example: if you obsess and try stay up late “studying & working,” then you are more likely to become fatigued. You either will sleep in which messes up your sleep schedule, or you will wake up at the same time as usual and be operating on less sleep.
The short-term benefits of the extra work do not help you achieve the long-term goals of success & good grades. Alternatively they inhibit you as you become fatigued & neurotic.
You may also damage your life in ways that are hard to observe. For example, you obsess & work 24/7. Your relationships with your partner & friends & family deteriorate which further makes you neurotic, which reduces the end quality of your work.
Trust in the Flow
Trusting in the flow is one of the most difficult things to do. A few days ago I had a very important marketing strategy that I had to create.
I kept procrastinating it due to the jet lag of flying to Bulgaria from Phoenix (10 hours time difference East, yikes).
On the last possible day for it to be done I finally started feeling good. Instead of stressing & immediately jumping into work, I took care of myself and went about the day relaxed.
Right before working on this strategy I had some amazing sex- again this could’ve only happened by being relaxed and letting go of the neurotic tendency to over-work.
When I began writing the strategy, I hit such a deep flow state because I was feeling so good & relaxed. Within a couple hours I created a nearly 3,000 words long in-depth marketing strategy which I’m proud of.
Now all of this being said, I recently err to the side of being lazy- so you should take everything I say with a grain of salt.
Perhaps I got lucky, or perhaps trusting in the flow is really the way to go. I’m providing this warning that I have been a lazy person recently to remind you to take everything I have to say into account, but don’t take it as gospel or infinite truth- you have your own life too!
99% of Everything is Impossible “NOW”
Back to what I said in the beginning of this article. I said that 99% of your goals & dreams are impossible now.
They are possible in the future, that I am certain of. I am certain you can get anything you want.
What you must realize is many things take time to manifest, so you shouldn’t be so attached or worried about achieving things now.
While motivational videos & inspiring quotes are nice, sometimes it’s nice to do the opposite and say “I can’t have this right now, but I know I’ll have this in the future, so I can relax and enjoy my evening.”
Oh how wonderful it is to release the burden of demanding success now when you can’t! Now you may celebrate this amazing day while also moving towards your long-term goals!
Goals & dreams often take care of themselves, especially during rest & break times. The reason for this is because the “seeds” need time to grow, or you need to regenerate your energy. Epiphanies are also often made when detaching.
The most important thing when it comes to success is to enjoy yourself & take take of yourself. 99% of things in the world require some degree of time in order to work so you shouldn’t stress about it when you don’t have it right now.
Instead sit back, relax and trust that you’re moving in the right direction. This doesn’t mean be lazy or not work, but instead to “be done” when the work is done. For example, put in the effort for the day, but then also have fun, relax, etc.
Enjoy the day, meet some friends, kiss your boyfriend or girlfriend- the day is beautiful! If you have taken actions to achieve your goal, then celebrate that.
You don’t need to achieve everything or anything now. Taking the step towards achieving it is enough, so go have some fun and then get back at it tomorrow as well.