What’s Moving with Michael- Sept 21
I had an idea for a new type of blog post: “what’s moving with Michael?” Let me know what you think about it. Hit “reply” right now and tell me if you like the idea or not.
As I’m more focused on working on my own business, I haven’t been writing so much self-help-related stuff as I often did in the past. I will be posting regularly on my Facebook though, to be honest, just so I can nurture prospects that have me added on Facebook (but still you’ll find the content valuable).
I’ve recently been getting more into a solid routine/flow by the week, but I’m finding that I feel unfulfilled in the weekend. My heart aches to work longer and harder.
On Saturday I’m thinking of writing 1-2 blog posts (one sent on Saturday, the other scheduled for Monday or something like that). One of them will be more personal life updates, filled with little insights & wisdom, but not a typical “hey this is self-help advice” type of post.
The other would be completely self-help or whatever… But I’m not even certain if I’ll do that.
As I’ve wrote previously, I’m working hard on growing my business and in doing so feeling too humbled to want to write any self-help posts. The more I grow, the more I realize just how little I actually know.
Anyways, I rather be a do-er than a talk-er. That being said the blog posts relating to my life would still contain valuable insights to you, just in the form of personal life stories & epiphanies.
What do you think of this? Let me know.
For now, let’s jump into this one. The style will probably just be a random flow of thoughts in no particular order.
Finally Europe is Habitable!
A few days ago the temperatures randomly dropped by a lot in Bulgaria. It was previously too hot to sleep without AC (and I have no AC because it’s Europe) and I was often struggling.
Now it’s cold enough to sleep. And wow, it’s the greatest blessing I could ever have.
I really underestimated just how much the weather plays a role in sleep. I always knew that I needed it cold to sleep, but now with my sleep quality so improved I am finding myself much happier.
Two Fascinating Lucid Dreams
In addition to the drop in temperature making sleep easier, I’ve started to have some very lucid dreams that have been fascinating.
In one I was given a “time lock” in which I could create a “save” similar to that of a video game, and then I could go back in time.
I went far back in time- around the time I first moved to Phoenix. But there was a problem: I lost some energy (or something like this) when I went back, so I couldn’t abuse this ability.
Furthermore even though I had the insights of the future that I have now, I still became the person I was back when I first moved to Phoenix.
Thus I’d still have to overcome the issues that I had then.
I moved forward in time, to the beginning of Bulgaria. I saw my ex on the streets, and one of her friends.
It was then that I realized I would have to fall in love, enjoy such a passionate, intense relationship, only to be met with heart break and darkness all over again.
For a moment in the dream I did not talk to her when I should’ve. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to walk down that path again.
But then I had an epiphany, which still fascinates me to this day (from the dream).
I realized that despite how dark things got, despite how fucked up things got, and how much everything hurt I realized that I like who I am now, I am better now, and there was nothing I would change in the past.
In the dream I brought the time lock back to the real present moment and set the device away- I would not be using it, ever.
I realized in the dream that I would not go back and change anything because everything turned out how it was meant to be.
It didn’t feel good always, it was a chaotic journey, but for some reason, I wouldn’t change a thing, even if my heart does long for that which could’ve been…
Then I woke up.
The next dream I had after a day of extremely long and hard work. There was a man and he was talking to me and someone else.
He told me that success was coming my way, I just had to keep going and hustling. It was inevitable that things would work out.
I was in the right place, at the right time, doing the right thing. I just had to keep adding fuel to the fire and my success would blow up.
“I was right where I was supposed to be doing what I needed to do” was again the theme of this dream!
It doesn’t always feel like this- I do have my struggles, but deep down, I believe this is true.
And the dreams were so lucid and beautiful that it confirmed it.
Pain & Pleasure, Past and Future: Bulgaria Remastered
Being in Bulgaria this time not in a relationship is a really different experiences given that the majority of my time here was spent in a deep, passionate relationship.
In some ways it has been quite painful- memories on every corner remind me of what was, and mutual friends are here to tell me stories of her if by even accident.
The heart longs for the past, longs for that which could’ve been.
I still don’t know yet whether being back in Bulgaria is a positive or a negative experience. I’m reaching a point where everything, both positive and negative, bleed into the whole.
No I’m not enlightened, I certainly feel pleasure/pain but what I mean is on a macro level it’s becoming increasingly difficult for me to judge my happiness in a particular place.
Everywhere has its pros n’ cons. When I’m in Asia I miss the things in USA, and when I’m in Bulgaria I miss Asia, and so on and so forth. There is always somewhere else which fulfills the lack in another place.
I guess this is just a big motivation for growing my business – I can be more free location-wise OR mitigate the problems of any particular location.
For example a big pro of Asia is that there are cheap, abundant massages everywhere. In USA or Bulgaria I’d have to earn more in order to afford the same equivalent massages.
But it goes the other way around too, so on and so forth. Everywhere has something the other places do not.
When you’re on a vacation you aren’t able to fully appreciate and integrate it, but since I’ve actually lived for extended periods in multiple countries it becomes harder to figure out which country is even ideal to live in!
I’ve spoken with a friend about wher we can find a “home base,” and we’ve agreed that there are two main factors:
The first is the daily routine. You must have a day to day life that you love. The next is whether it stimulates your long-term goals. Short-term at the expense of long-term leads to no progress, and long-term at the expense of short-term leads to burn out.
Regardless of where I live, I’ve been stating several affirmations that I’ve observed are re-programming my brain.
Without it even being a priority, I’m finding myself talking to pretty girls on the streets, sleeping better, and working harder and longer because of my affirmations. My subconscious mind is forcing me to act and make my affirmations a reality!
While my heart sometimes hurts here, I am making significant progress on my goals and the time zone here is much better than that of Asia for my goals. Sometimes I feel great, anyways.
I’ve also been questioning whether I was truly better in Asia or not- while I may have conscious hurt less, I don’t think I was taking as much action as I am currently towards my goals.
Who knows. As I’ve said it’s extremey hard to measure these things!
For now I am content here in Bulgaria. I’ve made new friends, cut out old people I didn’t really love, and am making progress in almost every area of my life.
I see a bright future and am actively working on creating it. I am doing my best to put the past in the past.
From Good… To Great
For the next year or two I have a 3-step plan to really kickstart and optimize my life into abundance.
The thing is in the past I’ve always been “good” in business, girls, and fitness, but never “great.”
I want to be great in everything, but I’m finding it difficult to tackle multiple things at once. So I’ve decided to make priorities in 3 steps, and break out of good in each category at a time.
First I hustle on my business, as I am doing now. This doesn’t mean I neglect fitness or dating- both are “good” now, though not ideal. I’m still continuing what I’m doing and that’s working out alright.
Once I hit a certain financial amount, I’ll be okay to hustle a bit less. I will then focus on other areas.
The next is dating. I’d like to really kickstart my dating life into abundance, and be like one of those top 1% guys that can seduce many girls super easily over the course of a week.
Finally I’ll optimize fitness. My fitness is good now but I would like to take it to great.
The thing which I’ve realized is that you can become great in anything but you must prioritize one at a time while balancing the others as they are. I’m finding however that as I focus hard on improving my finances, the other areas are naturally improve as motivation carries over.
My future visualization of life is very exciting and every day I can see it coming more and more into fruition.
Perhaps in a way the pain which I feel here about the past is good because it serves as a motivator to create a future 10x better.
Of course, I’m also being “present to the moment” and enjoying the process… That is completely key.
It’s a balance of both presence and progress. And right now I’d say I’m doing good.
Finding Faith
I’ve been praying a lot more recently, feeling more faithful and connected to spirituality. I’ve been asking God for guidance in the many areas of my life.
If I am to move on completely, I have asked for guidance on this. I have asked for guidance on where my primary home base should be. I have gived thanks for the skills that I have and results that I will get.
It seems to be increasing my energy and helping things manifest and come into fruition.
Something or someone is there, without easily being seen… You could miss it if you never prayed. But the Universe is there, listening to you. You just have to ask- and it shall be given.
Reminiscing of Asia… and USA
The torture of those who traveled too much is that they can always reminisce times from another distant continent no matter where they are. I love Bulgaria and where I am, but I must say I miss both Asia and the USA!
In the USA I have fond memories of an abundance of variety of food, some of the coolest parties ever, hustling on business, and just being silly/free. The hiking is incredible too in the West.
In Asia I miss the adventure, Thai food, parties, and incredible cafe scene. There’s only one coffee shop I’ve found in Sofia that compares to the cafe scene in Thailand. And I’m there every day, sometimes twice per day.
Being as I am almost half way (or half way?) through my visa in Bulgaria, I’ve naturally began to think: “where’s next?”
It is my priority to find a primary home base to settle in, but I’ve also considered taking a vacation before finding this home base. I guess we’ll see how things work out.
If I choose to go to USA, I’ll make a fine stop in Montreal as always. Though I may decide to swing back through Chiang Mai and spend another 2 months there before returning to USA.
It primarily depends on finances and feelings.
Bulgaria is a “cheap country” yet still so expensive when compared to Thailand. Rent is ½ the price, food is still ⅕ – 1/10 the price (yes, that’s right), and a motorbike is not even $100 USD per month for rental.
Anyways, I’ve just been missing both places and trying to evaluate what’s most important to me in where I make my primary base.
Coffee + Motorcycles
One thing that I need wherever I live is a motorcycle! It’s been on my list of “really, really wants” for so long but without having a home base I have had no need to purchase a motorcycle.
There is a crazy rental application that lets you get a 50CC Moped here in Bulgaria similar to the LIME scooters which has been fun, and surprisingly cheap, though 30 minutes on a moped here in Bulgaria is a higher cost than a whole day’s worth of rent in Chiang Mai.
Bulgaria has some really relaxed, nice traffic for motorcycling, but the Winter is less than ideal. In Chiang Mai it’s Asia so motorbikes are also solid, but traffic can be a bit much at times.
If I live in USA it’ll be somewhere in California, Nevada, or Arizona mainly for motorcycling. They all have very little rainfall, several sunny days, and good, dry weather.
Another thing I’d like to have wherever I live is a thriving cafe scene. Bulgaria is severely lacking in this!
Home Base Ideas September 2019
I’ve kind of ruled out Chiang Mai for the simple reason that it has “smoky season,” which makes it severlely polluted for 1-2 months out of the year. Wherever I live I will still travel, but I don’t want to be forced to travel if I don’t want to.
This has left the Phoenix area or Sofia. THAT is a tough choice.
Recently I’ve been receiving some recommendations to move to Vegas and check that out as well, and I actually have 3 separate friends there right now that could plug me into various social circles.
I’ve tried to do some research on Phoenix area vs. Vegas, but honestly that’s so difficult.
I’ve probably never even experienced America authentically for the simple reason that I’ve never had my own apartment and vehicle! I’ve always lived with my family there!
If I want to live in Bulgaria I will most likely have to go to USA anyways to apply for a visa, though one American friend apparently found a way to immigrate to Bulgaria via a loophole found in Germany. You get German residence (which is easier) then transfer it to Bulgaria.
It’s a bit frustrating that I’ve received multiple recommendations and even synchroncity about Vegas because I’m really tired of new places, and I want to minimize decision fatigue as much as possible.
For example, when you have too many opportunities to make a decision the harder it becomes to make one and the more likely you are to regret it.
I actually was considering San Diego and even had a suggestion to check out L.A., but I ruled it out for the simple fact that I don’t know anyone (well I do, but not deeper friends) in California and if I’m living in Phoenix/Vegas it’ll be easy to check it out anyways.
For now I’m just enjoying the present moment and letting go of the decision entirely. I’m letting my subconscious mind sort it out. Occasionally I feel compelled to randomly search up some information, which I figure is my subconscious deciding it needs more information. Then I let it go again and forget about it.
I will still want to travel wherever I live, so Vegas might be interesting for the sole reaosn that it has direct flights world-wide. It also would be a lot easier to get international friends to visit Vegas (who doesn’t want to go?) than Phoenix.
Still I observed that flights are getting cheaper everywhere anyways. When I first started traveling I don’t think there was a direct Phoenix -> Montreal flight. Now there is.
Now there is even a direct Phoenix -> Frankfurt (and back) flight which is extremely cheap AND on a nice airline (think like $300 USD or something like that).
When I first wanted to go to Europe I’d have to do all these crazy ridiculous flight paths like Phoenix -> San Fran -> London, or Phoenix -> Baltimore -> Boston -> London -> Sofia.
So it seems that even in Phoenix I’d have cheap international flights, but Vegas certainly wins on that department!
Unique Situations = Hard to Research
One reason I’m just letting the whole thing go until my subconscious mind can clearly figure out what it wants is because it’s SO fucking hard to logically research this when you have such a unique situation as me.
It seems that the vast majority of discussion around cities is job-related. Something which doesn’t apply to me as a self-employed remote worker.
People talk about the schools, the education, the jobs, etc. but none of that applies to me. I get it though because most people moving are going to be families or couples searching for a better famailial future.
It’s just a bit harder researching this stuff as a single self-employed remote worker. In the end I may just have to check it out myself.
But Abundance is Key
Ultimately I’m realizing I have to be happy inside anyways, and not to look for things in cities that cities can’t provide.
For example, I love motorcycles so it makes sense not to move to Alaska or Minnesota. This is a very logical, straight-forward example of how a certain desire can be met by moving.
But other things such as social circle & dating have to be fulfilled no matter where I am. Same with finances.
Ultimately I’ve enjoyed to an extent everywhere I’ve been, and most of the time my happiness or lack thereof had to do with optimizing wherever I was instead of being in a particular place.
For that very reason I’m interested in moving back to Southwest USA just for easier business/visa purposes. If it is just a good girlfriend, great friends, and abundant finances + motorcycles that make me happy, then maybe I should just live there?
That’s just yet another idea… Sofia, Bulgaria is completely on the tables.
Fluency in Bulgarian
The one thing about Bulgaria though is there’s a slight probability I will want to become fluent in Bulgarian if I live here.
My Bulgarian is good enough to impress people and order things or whatever, but not enough to handle group dynamics.
When hanging out in certain international social circles it’s no problem I’m not fluent, but it does pain me a bit when I’m not able to connect with people deeply because they switch to Bulgarian (understandably).
The question I’m trying to figure out is whether I can make learning Bulgarian a priority or not. I don’t need to do it, but it’s gonna help living here a lot.
Observing American Culture
This section is going to seem really random having not been in USA for a while, but I’m observing that information tends to sift in my mind over the course of several months then come out as an epiphany later. For example, I read “power vs. force” in March and only recently began applying what I’ve learned.
You know one thing about the “USA” is that there is actually is variances in culture across the USA, but most people can’t easily see it. USA is one of the HARDEST countries to travel because you need (usually) to rent a car, and many of the very “American” things are found far away from L.A. or New York.
Living in Europe, I often brainlessly agree that there is “no culture” there but now that I’ve traveled in earlier this year to various parts of the USA I can actually appreciate variances in it.
In fact, did you know most people IN the USA hardly say things like “I’m from USA,” or “I’m American?”
People often identify with their STATE. “I’m from Nebraska” or “I’m from Texas” is more normal.
And there are huge differences in each state. All because everyone speaks English doesn’t mean there isn’t a big change in culture. It just makes it less easy to observe, especially if you aren’t able to properly travel the “USA.”
Some of the main regions include the Southwest (Arizona, Nevada, New Mexico), California, Pacific Northwest (Oregon, Montana, Washington), Midwest (Nebraska, South Dakota, etc.), Northeast (Illionois), New England (Maryland, Maine, etc.), Texas, Southeast (Florida, South Carolina, etc.).
Note: I probably got this wrong but you get the general feel.
I had the opportunity to travel to many places earlier this year, and I must say that the differences in culture and even architecture is rather apparent and quite shocking.
For example, Nebraska (at least when I was growing up) was consistently ranked as the “happiest state.” It’s normal to speak more formally (sir, madam) and also order in such a way where you say “could I have one coffee please,” instead of in other places (ie. Chicago) where you might say “I will drink one coffee.”
It’s really interesting observing these things upon reflection, and as I keep saying it makes me extremely curious to go back and live indepenently away from family and really experience the “real USA,” which I’ve only had tastes of.
Here are a few examples of differences I’ve observed:
In Chicago people are more harsh and upfront. They are more cold and direct. People can tend to come more off as “assholes.” That doesn’t make them bad or worse- it’s just how they are.
A ton of slavic cultures make up Chicago. There is the Ukranian village for example, and while I was there I met Ukranians, Bulgarians, and I believe Serbians.
In Nebraska we are kind and accommodating (but only if we feel safe with you), relaxed and generally authentic. People are helpful and compassionate, especially due to Nebraska’s extremely dangerous and volatile climate.
In Texas people are particularly religious (or in higher frequency). Prayer during business meetings is not uncommon. People are extremely kind and welcoming and love to have a good time. They don’t mind being loud n’ big. They love their independence too, hence the more open gun culture and belief in lethal self-defense on their property.
In California people are ultra-friendly, always smiling and generally healthy. Beach life is more common. People are flaky and focused more on saving face. The pro here is that it’s easy to strike up conversations and meet people, the con being that people will not tell you if they don’t like you.
In Arizona people are generally more spiritual and open-minded. It is less judgy and quite diverse, except instead of diverse in terms of slavic culture it has a lot of Latin influence.
These are VERY rough generalizations, and a lot of them sound similar. There is a different vibe in each place that is hard to explain. The way you live in each place is also different.
For example Chicago has public transit, whereas the Phoenix area not so much.
So To Be Clear About USA…
When I say that “I’m curious about living there,” I’m actually just referring to the Southwest – Nevada, Arizona, or California (leaning towards Nevada or Arizona to start).
It’s actually rather strange when people generalize the entirety of the USA, or any country for that matter. Even in Bulgaria- foreigners can’t seem to agree on what a Bulgarian is.
Abundance in Tech is so key
My old laptop is dying. The hard drive will fail any day now. It can’t connect to WiFi. It makes me sad.
I rushed a laptop purchase without fully understanding what all specs mean and regret it. My new temporary laptop is slow and annoying.
Going from an SSD Core i7 & 16GB RAM to an HDD Core i3 with 4GB RAM is insane. This is plain-speak for ultra-fast to ultra-slow.
If I had just invested a couple hundred more dollars I would actually have had a laptop that fulfilled my requirements, so it is upsetting to me to know that I kind of just wasted the money I spent on this laptop because it’s SO bad I will hardly use it except for maybe watching movies on flights- IF THAT.
They say money can’t buy happiness, but it can damn well purchase usefulness and usefulness makes everything smoother and easier!
Focusing Longer
Recently I’ve been trying to focus longer and harder every day. A few weeks ago when I started measuring my abilities it was rather shocking just how little I could spend in a flow state per week.
Now I am doing SO much better and thus making more visible progress in each week. It’s an exciting challenge.
This is all for now
That’s all for now. Things are as they are. I’m taking things one step a time. Mainly focused on business, but enjoying things in the meantime!
How are you? Let me know. 🙂
-Michael
